I’m sure everyone has heard the proverb, “Why purchase the mild when you can have the cow for free?” It refers to males who don’t want to get married since they can enjoy all the advantages of marriage without being married. Whatever works for you, by all means, do it. However, I advise women who want to get married not to love move in with someone they are dating because, nine times out of ten, they won’t get the proposal or marriage they want, and when they do, it will be ten years later, when the thrill and excitement will be gone and they won’t see the value in it, and they probably won’t want to stay in the relationship. I recognize that being in love with someone makes you want to be with them constantly, to embrace and kiss them, and that the idea of going up to them each morning to prepare breakfast for them in the role of a wife will forever remain a fantasy. When individuals live together but are not married to them, they are not considering their future, their self-respect, or the legality of the arrangement. I don’t recommend living with someone you are dating for the following reasons.
Never will they ask you to marry them.
You provide a guy you are not married with easy access to your identity and all that comes with it, including your body, your energy, your cooking and housekeeping skills, and maybe your money, when you live with him. Therefore, if he is getting everything from you, there is no point in saving up to buy you a nice engagement ring, organizing a thoughtful proposal, and putting in the effort for your relationship because you have already made it simple for him to access all of the wonderful things that come with you.
If you’re young, you still have to discover who you are.
If you are in your twenties, I advise you to hold off on moving in with someone since you could still be in a position where you need to discover who you are. It will be difficult to achieve so if you live with someone who can influence how you view the world. If anything, move into your own house so you may experience what it’s like to live alone and discover how to take care of yourself. This will prevent you from feeling compelled to reveal all you own, especially aspects of yourself that you are still working out. You will also be required to involve your spouse in every decision you make, which will make you feel suffocated by someone you are not married to.
You both get overly comfortable.
If you’re in a relationship with someone who isn’t married, you two will probably settle into a pattern of waking up, going to work, coming home, preparing dinner, and going to bed without thinking about your love life or dates. As individuals become comfortable, time may fly quickly, and if you and your partner are not planning for the future, years can pass that have been wasted. Due to the convenient pattern you have established, it will be challenging to end the relationship if the two of you one day decide you no longer love one another
Insecurity will set in.
You’ll probably feel uneasy since you’re unsure if they’re living with you because they genuinely love you and want to spend the rest of their lives with you, or whether they merely regard it as a business arrangement. Because life is expensive, they believe that moving in with you would make their lives simpler. As a result, they will work less and become less ambitious because they will know that they will have to share the cost of living expenses with you.
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You’ll stop having self-respect.
If you live with someone, you will start to lose self-respect because if you are not ready, you will not be able to prioritize your needs and wants and will start to put everything you want to the side in order to make the people you are firmly dedicated to. You will soon have to swap out I for Us since you have experienced life long enough, which will cause you to lose your identity and ensnare you in a relationship that might not provide you with anything of real value.
You’ll encounter legal problems.
Oftentimes, young individuals or people in general don’t consider what would happen if the person they are living with passed away when they move in with. What would happen if there was no will or life insurance between you? In such a case, you would have to assume that the deceased’s assets would transfer to their family, leaving you with nothing. You will find yourself in a terrifying and devastating predicament as a result of having to figure out how to replace the money you have just lost from the deceased. As a result, you will be unable to adequately mourn.
In closing, I would advise anybody considering living with an unmarried partner to do it carefully because it is a very important decision that might make or break both your personal and romantic relationships. Just because someone wants to be in a relationship with you doesn’t imply they love you; rather, it merely indicates they need a vacation from full-fledged adult responsibilities and want unfettered access to someone they can have sex with. If you want to be married someday, please obtain a house of your own first. Decorate it to reflect your style and experience what it’s like to pay the bills without relying on anybody or having someone rely on you. Whatever old you are, don’t hurry into sharing a bed with someone who hasn’t shown you enough respect to put a ring on your finger. Living with someone is a significant responsibility. Hence, only step in when you are ready, mature, and engaged to walk into a great marriage.